To be stigmatized

In Uncategorized on July 13, 2013 at 06:44

A reply to one of my previous posts has made me thinking. One of my children is ill and the social services have demanded that I pay for the treatment because I as a parent have genes which are to blame for the condition.

In Denmark we have laws which were made to make parents pay who marry within the family (like second cousins) and the relationship creates children will expensive illnesses the society have to cure. In my family we have a history of illness and when my family was hit with a tragedy I had a dark period where I wasn’t speaking with many people. I found relief in my garden and my work. But my family needed more than a dad who came around with money and was gardening so I visited my doctor and spoke with mental guy. It was on record and when my child became ill with a more severe depression the blame was quickly put on me because if you were not aware depression can infect those you live with.

Had I know I would have carried a stick with a bell so I could have warned people in advance before I approached them. I am not from an upper-class family so we had no tradition with boarding schools. We don’t have this urge with self-realization some parents have. We don’t expect to pay for the education of our children because we pay more than 50 percent of our income in taxes. We have a gap of 7 years to catch up with when it comes to retirement age because the normal retirement age of 60 has been raised to 67 which is a higher number than male family members expect to live in my family. My father died when he was 63 and two of my uncles died age 59 and 61. It is a heart condition which cannot be treated outside Copenhagen and because hospitals in my region of Denmark has to pay to refer a heart patient to Copenhagen they don’t refer people. People die instead and in fact I don’t mind dying if I die protecting the economy of the local community. Just if I at the very end can look back of a good life with perhaps just a couple of good years in the end in retirement. It doesn’t seem that I can reach that goal in life.

Because of the demand of payment the social services have put forward I cannot save money enough for early retirement and having served in the highest position I could expect to reach regarding my business career since age 30 all I do is trying to keep more ambitious people from claiming my job. Just a little more than 10 years before the end of my life I seem to have lost it all.

My child is improving and will return home where we hope that the period in the life of my child will never be mentioned again. But then what comes after? Will we be forced to sell our house and move out in the country where housing is cheaper but where we would be aliens and our children will have fewer opportunities regarding education and job?

I fell stigmatized due to the economically consequences of my illness. I have destroyed the future I had for the entire family and what about my children? Can they establish their own family at one time? Because they have the same genes! They might be forced to pay if their children will catch depression.

The future is not bright.

Law number 498 from 2011 (Link in Danish)

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