Adoption bizarre – a small story of money and adoption

In culture on November 26, 2012 at 22:26

I am a Dane. I do believe in God. I believe that a life starts when you can monitor a heartbeat. However sometimes nature cancels the creation of live in the first trimester and that is why accept abortion before the first 12 weeks are gone when the fetus is ill or the life of the mother is at stake.

I also believe that there are cases where the mother accepts that she is not the right parent for the child she has granted life. That is why I support adoption. Two different headlines broadcasted in the Danish media have challenged my faith.

The first of the two headlines were that Danish adoption agencies are pushing parents down in Africa to adopt their children on false facts. They also broadcasted a documentary showing a Danish family adopting two children. The parents had HIV and they were lied to so they believed that they would be dead within months. They were promised that they would get progress reports and photos of the children from their life in Denmark. They were lied to. They got no reports despite the fact that the Danish adoptive parents wrote the reports they were required to.

But the story didn’t there. The Danish parents experienced difficulties with the oldest child. It was very obvious that they were not prepared for what is called reactive attachment disorder. The oldest child was 3 years old. A child at that age you have to give time and space. You cannot expect it to be your child fully and 100 percent. The parents were offered part time foster care where the child took a weekend off from the new family. The mother seemed to be jealous of the things the child was given during her time in the foster family. She was insecure regarding her role as an adoptive mother and I have to say knowing something about the business I was not impressed with the psychological approach she was advised to use.

The documentary ended with the girl being placed at some group home in Denmark. Group homes in Denmark is not for children, the employees often lack education, there is violence and even if an employee forced a girl to oral sex and he is convicted the punishment is only 60 days suspended as it was the case in a recent episode on an island near in the northern part of Jutland. The birth parents continued to morn the children they lost contact to and due to new medication they were still alive, were working and had even adopted a child themselves.

The present adoption system is sick and should be stopped. It is not that I am against adoptions. I believe that there would be children in Denmark who would benefit from an open adoption given that the social services would aid the families in this matter.

This is by the way a two part blog. Tomorrow I will write about a nation which is so competitive that it would allow murder. If you are guessing that the country I will write about is Denmark you guess right, but I will not spoil your expectations so you just have to wait until tomorrow.


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